Buddhism recognizes change, thankfully. I am not without assistance therefore, when encountering major changes arriving in rapid fire. Although I would like to have a 'slow down' button to press, I think that I am doing 'ok' at least, if not pretty good, with all the change happening this month and next.
After wishing that bureaucratic institutions would hurry up a little, I am suddenly finding the last few pieces falling into place and my own life needing to speed up to handle everything. This time last week, I was looking at waiting 4-9 weeks before moving overseas. Yesterday, it shot forward to '13 days time'.
Within these last 13 days, I have tickets to attend H.H.D.L.'s Nagarjuna teachings in Sydney, an adult son to re-house, a 3-bedroom home and yard to clean and tidy - and pack or sell…
Buddhism has not left me screaming in chaos - although my heart might be pacing a tad faster. I can fall back into knowing that I am moving for the right reasons, to the right place, at the right time, to do the right thing. THIS time, I am moving because of the needs of others rather than a desirous heart, to offer assistance rather than seek out a dream, and to practice Buddhism in my life rather than wish I had more opportunity to act.
UPDATE: I wrote this blog yesterday, aimed at posting it today - already another change has arrived - due to my son's accommodation falling through, I am going to be delayed back to waiting 6-9 weeks after all...
UPDATE: But coming online today, I see my son should be eligible for said accommodation and may be able to pursue it after all. This means I may still be traveling in less than 2 weeks time OR in 7-9 weeks... and do not yet know!
I seem to be on a rapidly moving see-saw between helping my father by being THERE and helping my son by being HERE... Buddhism has taught me that providing I can eliminate any personal desires and emotions, and focus on these two people and the situation, I should not suffer whichever date I fly or way life turns...
Without Buddhism, I would be screaming in the midst of a chaotic mess right now!
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
Short quotes
"We humans are the only species with the power to destroy the earth as we know it. The birds have no such power, nor do the insects, nor does any mammal. Yet if we have the capacity to destroy the earth, so, too, do we have the capacity to protect it." ~ HHDL
"Silence your own emotions, and those of others sound far clearer. When you learn to focus on your clear light mind and cease to become obsessed with your own emotions, you become free to empathize with other sentient beings. You will then find yourself picking up their emotions. This can be an extremely confusing stage if you do not know that you are taking a step closer to becoming a Buddha." ~ a friend of mine
"How 'whizzzzzzz' and 'zzzzz' are rectified in meditation needs to be applied to the whole of one's life - especially when life is spent mostly in meditation!" ~ me
"Silence your own emotions, and those of others sound far clearer. When you learn to focus on your clear light mind and cease to become obsessed with your own emotions, you become free to empathize with other sentient beings. You will then find yourself picking up their emotions. This can be an extremely confusing stage if you do not know that you are taking a step closer to becoming a Buddha." ~ a friend of mine
"How 'whizzzzzzz' and 'zzzzz' are rectified in meditation needs to be applied to the whole of one's life - especially when life is spent mostly in meditation!" ~ me
Wednesday, November 11, 2009
A problem to solve
I can understand the principle of offering assistance to others, but I am still learning how to actually put this into practice. Obviously, when encountering real life rather than contemplations, readings, or plans, there are going to be some difficult situations to learn from. I am currently experiencing one such matter.
There are two separate beings that I could assist. However, I cannot assist them both at the same time. The reason for this being that they live in separate countries and need physical presence as a part of the help required.
I find myself willing to assist both and able to assist either - but not both at once. Both have major temporary problems, both are related to me as family members, both have been analyzed and are free from personal preference or 'my choice', and both are counting on me - but, there is only one me and I am unable to assist both at once.
I have tried entering the know-zone, but the preparations for my upcoming travels, difficulty with another problem, compulsory brain-washing courses, and trying to organize an overseas relocation for 'soon' are somewhat limiting my ability to rest there.
I therefore estimate that my lesson to be learned here is not am I or am I not willing to help, nor can I or cannot I help, nor am I free of personal desire in making a choice, but something else. Perhaps I have to practice waiting patiently for answers to 'appear', maybe I need to use communication with one whilst actualization with the other, or perhaps I have to find some other track from which to analyze this…
Whatever happens, whatever I decide, I am bound to learn something new to help my studies - at least I have that!
There are two separate beings that I could assist. However, I cannot assist them both at the same time. The reason for this being that they live in separate countries and need physical presence as a part of the help required.
I find myself willing to assist both and able to assist either - but not both at once. Both have major temporary problems, both are related to me as family members, both have been analyzed and are free from personal preference or 'my choice', and both are counting on me - but, there is only one me and I am unable to assist both at once.
I have tried entering the know-zone, but the preparations for my upcoming travels, difficulty with another problem, compulsory brain-washing courses, and trying to organize an overseas relocation for 'soon' are somewhat limiting my ability to rest there.
I therefore estimate that my lesson to be learned here is not am I or am I not willing to help, nor can I or cannot I help, nor am I free of personal desire in making a choice, but something else. Perhaps I have to practice waiting patiently for answers to 'appear', maybe I need to use communication with one whilst actualization with the other, or perhaps I have to find some other track from which to analyze this…
Whatever happens, whatever I decide, I am bound to learn something new to help my studies - at least I have that!
Monday, November 9, 2009
Time will tell
I was reflecting on how much I have changed over the past 3-4 years, since I first picked up a Buddhist book, then another, another, and… I was soon reading and practicing too much to call myself anything but a Buddhist.
Although there is still much work to be done, the progress over the past 2-3 years of my life has been much greater than my entire life to that day. A mere five years ago, I still had remains of my childhood Spanish temper raging and roaring in my head, even if I had learned to control my body since becoming adult. Back then, I very rarely thought of other people apart from my close family and friends. I used to kill bugs, bait mice, and eat meat nearly everyday, without a thought to what I was doing.
Looking at myself now, I am not yet perfect, but I have come a long way. My angry furious mood is usually restricted to a mild irritation or annoyance, I am fully vegetarian and almost vegan, I don’t use any bug killer or bait at all, and I have recently begun to think of other people before myself.
The latter is something I did not think would be possible - yet I am in the middle of a situation where my difficulties lie between how to best please two other parties. I suddenly realized, whilst considering the two options, that I had altogether forgotten to think about what would be best for myself! It simply had not crossed my mind. This was quite amazing to me - it remains a surprise that I have managed to get this far considering my selfish and greedy past. I am not saying I am entirely improved - but that the first steps are finally surfacing.
Although there is still much work to be done, the progress over the past 2-3 years of my life has been much greater than my entire life to that day. A mere five years ago, I still had remains of my childhood Spanish temper raging and roaring in my head, even if I had learned to control my body since becoming adult. Back then, I very rarely thought of other people apart from my close family and friends. I used to kill bugs, bait mice, and eat meat nearly everyday, without a thought to what I was doing.
Looking at myself now, I am not yet perfect, but I have come a long way. My angry furious mood is usually restricted to a mild irritation or annoyance, I am fully vegetarian and almost vegan, I don’t use any bug killer or bait at all, and I have recently begun to think of other people before myself.
The latter is something I did not think would be possible - yet I am in the middle of a situation where my difficulties lie between how to best please two other parties. I suddenly realized, whilst considering the two options, that I had altogether forgotten to think about what would be best for myself! It simply had not crossed my mind. This was quite amazing to me - it remains a surprise that I have managed to get this far considering my selfish and greedy past. I am not saying I am entirely improved - but that the first steps are finally surfacing.
Tuesday, November 3, 2009
Practice V study
I find it very difficult to practice more than study, and much easier to study a lot and practice a little. This seems to work for me, although I know it is the case for everyone.
I find that if I KNOW something, I can act upon what I know much easier, clearer, and quicker than if I have to learn it by finding out.
I find that if I ACT and then learn what I have done right or wrong from my actions, it is more difficult, complex, and messy than if I already know what t do and err only in the activity.
I therefore like to study a lot, and learn from internal experiences and wisdom as step one, with step two being practicing acting it out and 'fine-tuning' based on the results.
Recently, I have had no brain-time to memorize texts, meditate properly, or focus on the Dharma - due to 'everyday life' being difficult for a while. This has made it essential to act and then learn from the results instead, and I make far more errors this way, which takes much longer.
Hopefully in a month or two, I will have sorted out my hassles and be free once more to study 75% and practice 25%!
I find that if I KNOW something, I can act upon what I know much easier, clearer, and quicker than if I have to learn it by finding out.
I find that if I ACT and then learn what I have done right or wrong from my actions, it is more difficult, complex, and messy than if I already know what t do and err only in the activity.
I therefore like to study a lot, and learn from internal experiences and wisdom as step one, with step two being practicing acting it out and 'fine-tuning' based on the results.
Recently, I have had no brain-time to memorize texts, meditate properly, or focus on the Dharma - due to 'everyday life' being difficult for a while. This has made it essential to act and then learn from the results instead, and I make far more errors this way, which takes much longer.
Hopefully in a month or two, I will have sorted out my hassles and be free once more to study 75% and practice 25%!